Cymothoa exigua, or the tongue eating louse, is a parisitic isopod that attaches itself to a fish and crawls inside it through it's gills to the mouth. It then attaches it's front claws to the fishes tongue and draws blood through them until the tongue atrophies and shrivels away. It then attaches it's legs to the fish's tongue ligaments and replaces the tongue as a working organ. In some cases, it lives with the fish for the rest of it's life; feeding off more blood or fish mucus.
I am plotting to **** my pants outside in the woods after holding it in for about a week. Lets say circumstances are the same as being inside though. How can I make the experience better?
I am not sure the premise of the question. Pooping in the woods would be far more exciting then pooping inside because of the element of discovery and the lack of facilities. For me the experience is quite fulfilling in itself as an ****** usually takes place afterward which makes it even more fulfilling. The only thing better would be a naked chic to ****** into.
If you are into experimentation, I have tried the following. Performing activities during and after the pooping. For example, mowing the grass, fixing a wall, fixing the car, etc. Performing exercises and lifting weights has also been very exciting. Especially the bending over kinds. You may try diapers or other types or sexes of underwear. Also different positions at the time of pooping, standing up, sitting down, laying down, etc.
That was much bigger than i had anticipated, but it felt awesome. I knew i would have a good pooping weekend this weekend so Wednesday after my daily dump i decided i'd wait until tonight to go again. That's not really that long to wait, but i figured i'd still get a larger than average load so i held it. Yesterday i had strong urges all day, but i wanted to wait until tonight so i could have a good load in my pants so still i held on. Today it was pretty uncomfortable all day and toward the end of the day it was getting hard for me to pee without ******** my pants but i managed. By the time i got home to an empty house it was getting uncomfortable to sit down, i went to pee and realised that i couldn't. I tried but everytime i tried to pee it felt like my *** was going to give in and i wasn't quite ready, plus i hate pooping my pants in the bathroom it just doesn't do anything for me. I decided to lay down on the couch (on my side) and watch some tv and see if i could relax and let the poop come out on it's own. I layed there and relaxed and it felt like it wanted to come out, but it wouldn't budge, i reached back there to check things out and discovered that i could feel my ******* was relaxed but it just wouldn't move. I waited and waited but still it wouldn't budge and by now i really really had to pee but when i went to the bathroom i still couldn't pee. I decided to just say the hell with it and go to my old standby.......I went out for a smoke. I put on my favorite pee/poop pants and stepped out into the back yard. I figured once i started peeing the whole load would just slide on out.........I was wrong. I started peeing and it felt like the load was moving so i pushed a little harder and only peed harder, the poop refused to move so i continued pushing harder and harder, i was soaking my pants, peeing as hard as i could the whole time when finally the load started creeping out very slowly. I felt it moving ever so slowly, stretching my ******* as it moved until finally it felt like i could stretch no further. By now my undies were tented as far as they could go but the end was still in me so i had to tug on my undies to make room for the rest to come out but i still couldn't get it to move so i went back inside and ******** down to just my undies and squatted down in the tub to push some more and pulled on the seat of my undies some more and finally got the end out of me. I got out and looked in the mirror and it was the biggest load i've had in a very long time. I enjoyed it, but i'm still partial to a good mushy load. I wish i'd had a nice soft load this size, that would have made my night. I'm still sitting in it (it felt like a damn brick when i first sat on it, but it's softened some the longer i've sat here) but i'll probably get cleaned up soon. I'm hoping for a couple more good loads before sunday gets here.
I am not sure the premise of the question. Pooping in the woods would be far more exciting then pooping inside because of the element of discovery and the lack of facilities. For me the experience is quite fulfilling in itself as an ****** usually takes place afterward which makes it even more fulfilling. The only thing better would be a naked chic to ****** into.
If you are into experimentation, I have tried the following. Performing activities during and after the pooping. For example, mowing the grass, fixing a wall, fixing the car, etc. Performing exercises and lifting weights has also been very exciting. Especially the bending over kinds. You may try diapers or other types or sexes of underwear. Also different positions at the time of pooping, standing up, sitting down, laying down, etc.
That was much bigger than i had anticipated, but it felt awesome. I knew i would have a good pooping weekend this weekend so Wednesday after my daily dump i decided i'd wait until tonight to go again. That's not really that long to wait, but i figured i'd still get a larger than average load so i held it. Yesterday i had strong urges all day, but i wanted to wait until tonight so i could have a good load in my pants so still i held on. Today it was pretty uncomfortable all day and toward the end of the day it was getting hard for me to pee without ******** my pants but i managed. By the time i got home to an empty house it was getting uncomfortable to sit down, i went to pee and realised that i couldn't. I tried but everytime i tried to pee it felt like my *** was going to give in and i wasn't quite ready, plus i hate pooping my pants in the bathroom it just doesn't do anything for me. I decided to lay down on the couch (on my side) and watch some tv and see if i could relax and let the poop come out on it's own. I layed there and relaxed and it felt like it wanted to come out, but it wouldn't budge, i reached back there to check things out and discovered that i could feel my ******* was relaxed but it just wouldn't move. I waited and waited but still it wouldn't budge and by now i really really had to pee but when i went to the bathroom i still couldn't pee. I decided to just say the hell with it and go to my old standby.......I went out for a smoke. I put on my favorite pee/poop pants and stepped out into the back yard. I figured once i started peeing the whole load would just slide on out.........I was wrong. I started peeing and it felt like the load was moving so i pushed a little harder and only peed harder, the poop refused to move so i continued pushing harder and harder, i was soaking my pants, peeing as hard as i could the whole time when finally the load started creeping out very slowly. I felt it moving ever so slowly, stretching my ******* as it moved until finally it felt like i could stretch no further. By now my undies were tented as far as they could go but the end was still in me so i had to tug on my undies to make room for the rest to come out but i still couldn't get it to move so i went back inside and ******** down to just my undies and squatted down in the tub to push some more and pulled on the seat of my undies some more and finally got the end out of me. I got out and looked in the mirror and it was the biggest load i've had in a very long time. I enjoyed it, but i'm still partial to a good mushy load. I wish i'd had a nice soft load this size, that would have made my night. I'm still sitting in it (it felt like a damn brick when i first sat on it, but it's softened some the longer i've sat here) but i'll probably get cleaned up soon. I'm hoping for a couple more good loads before sunday gets here.
Dear Ass Master,
My boyfriend keeps telling me that if I learn to eat his ass deep enough, I could lick his prostate. Is that really true?
Betty, OH
Betty,
Unless you have an abnormally long tongue, I don't believe you will be able to lick your boyfriend's prostate. The prostate is a small gland located above the rectum and at the bottom of the bladder. It surrounds the urethra like a life preserver. You can massage the prostate with a finger or ass toy, but your tongue just cannot stick far enough out to do any good.
I suspect your boyfriend really gets off on having his ass eaten. The next time he's telling you to eat deeper and lick his prostate, why not give him a surprise. Slip a hand into a well lubricated rubber glove and slide a finger into his ass. He may object a little at first. But once you start stroking his prostate and gently pulling on his balls with your other hand, he'll be shooting his load and weak in the knees in no time.
Dear Ass Master,
My husband has a really hairy ass. Lately he has been wondering what it would feel like to have me shave his ass before eating him out. I'm used to eating his round furry butt. What if I get razor burns? Worse yet, what if I cut him? I've never shaved a butt crack before. What should I do?
Tina, CA
Tina,
The debate over ass shaving has been going on for a long time. Those who are into it will tell you that they feel a heightened sensation without the hair. So it is possible that your husband would go wild if you ate his smooth hairless ass. But please consider the risks. As shaving causes small cuts in the skin, it is considered an unsafe sex practice. If you are going to do this, please follow some basic safety tips for shaving.
Trim the hair in the area down with an electric trimmer or scissors.
Have him sit in a hot bath to soften the skin and hair.
Use a shaving gel formulated for sensitive skin or women's shaving.
Always use a new disposable razor designed for sensitive skin.
Never use a straight razor unless you are a trained professional.
Be gentle and take your time. Trying to hurry will only cause you to nick the sensitive skin of his ass.
My boyfriend keeps telling me that if I learn to eat his ass deep enough, I could lick his prostate. Is that really true?
Betty, OH
Betty,
Unless you have an abnormally long tongue, I don't believe you will be able to lick your boyfriend's prostate. The prostate is a small gland located above the rectum and at the bottom of the bladder. It surrounds the urethra like a life preserver. You can massage the prostate with a finger or ass toy, but your tongue just cannot stick far enough out to do any good.
I suspect your boyfriend really gets off on having his ass eaten. The next time he's telling you to eat deeper and lick his prostate, why not give him a surprise. Slip a hand into a well lubricated rubber glove and slide a finger into his ass. He may object a little at first. But once you start stroking his prostate and gently pulling on his balls with your other hand, he'll be shooting his load and weak in the knees in no time.
Dear Ass Master,
My husband has a really hairy ass. Lately he has been wondering what it would feel like to have me shave his ass before eating him out. I'm used to eating his round furry butt. What if I get razor burns? Worse yet, what if I cut him? I've never shaved a butt crack before. What should I do?
Tina, CA
Tina,
The debate over ass shaving has been going on for a long time. Those who are into it will tell you that they feel a heightened sensation without the hair. So it is possible that your husband would go wild if you ate his smooth hairless ass. But please consider the risks. As shaving causes small cuts in the skin, it is considered an unsafe sex practice. If you are going to do this, please follow some basic safety tips for shaving.
Trim the hair in the area down with an electric trimmer or scissors.
Have him sit in a hot bath to soften the skin and hair.
Use a shaving gel formulated for sensitive skin or women's shaving.
Always use a new disposable razor designed for sensitive skin.
Never use a straight razor unless you are a trained professional.
Be gentle and take your time. Trying to hurry will only cause you to nick the sensitive skin of his ass.
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